Monday, June 18, 2007

THE HUMAN LION

It strikes me that I wrote about this subject a year or so ago but I couldn't find it in the archive. Maybe I just thought about writing about it and never got around to it. Anyway here's my thoughts on this subject and if I'm repeating myself then...then I apologize!!

The subject is...the human lion. Every girl wants to marry a guy who has the attributes of a lion. The guy may be short or poor or ugly, but if he's a lion then he's choice marriage material.



I can't define what a lion is but you know it when you see it. When I see a woman who's intelligent and noble and yet thoroughly feminine, that's close to what I mean by being lion-like. Somehow the femininity helps to bring into focus the other qualities, which either sex could possess, and overlays them with a sense of unique character and depth and appeal. When you see a feminine woman with lion-like characteristics you feel (in addition to being horny) glad to be human, in fact you feel positively proud to be human.

Of course the analogy doesn't totally hold because in the end only a guy can be a lion. Why is that? Maybe it's because a man has to struggle past more obstacles or diversions to become a lion. Maybe because the characteristics of a lion perfectly suit the male temperament. It's what all men want to be and very few are able to achieve.


My guess is that human lions are rare. Maybe one in ten or one in twenty, maybe one in a hundred. My advice to women who are lucky enough to know a lion is to push all other players aside and do everything they can to nail the guy. Lions are the kings of the jungle for a reason. No matter what negatives the guy possesses, they don't matter (provided he's not a criminal type). Lion trumps almost any flaw. Unfortunately there's not enough lions to go around. Maybe it takes a lioness to trap a lion.


There's a great movie about this: "Dodsworth" with Walter Houston and Mary Astor. The whole film is a meditation on the subject of the human lion. I wish there were more films like this.

26 comments:

Anonymous said...

I've never heard of this human lion concept, so I tried doing some research on wikipedia, and found this link to a sculpture that might be of interest:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lion-human

Apparently, it's one of the oldest statues around.

Jenny Lerew said...

Isn't Dodsworth about a lion who-to his regret- married a poodle?

Stephen Worth said...

Eddie, you're even better than a human lion- You're a human duck billed platypus!

See ya
Steve

Katie said...

Sorry Eddie, I disagree somewhat! Ever since I saw a National Geographic about lions as a little girl I've disliked them- they seem lazy and undeserving of the "noble and proud" stereotype that they get. The girls were doing all the hard work bringing in fresh meat while the males were busy eating babies. On the other hand, hyenas, who aren't as nice looking, get pegged as nasty scavengers. They're actually excelent hunters, and have an organized and interesting heirarchy/family group. You should read about it!

I suppose I agree that the best guys are the ones with noble qualities, but I'd associate them with a different animal...I can't figure out which one though! I'll get back to you on that...

Lester Hunt said...

I guess I agree with Katie. Male lions are good at making copies of their DNA, but that's about it. Well, they do look cool, too.

Anonymous said...

Spotted hyenas have females as the leaders. They're larger than the males and dominate them.

From Wiki:

One unusual feature of the spotted hyena is that females have an enlarged clitoris called a pseudo-penis or demi-penis. Female hyenas give birth, copulate, and urinate through their protruding genitalia, which stretches to allow the male penis to enter for copulation, and it also stretches during birth. The anatomical position of the genitalia gives females total sexual control over who is allowed to mate with them. Researchers originally thought that one of the things that causes this characteristic of the genitals is androgens that are expressed to the foetus very early on in its development. However, it was discovered that when the androgens are held back from the fetus, the development of the female genitalia was not altered.

All species excrete an oily, yellow substance from their anal glands onto objects to mark their territories. When scent marking, the anal pouch is turned inside out, or everted. Hyenas also do this as a submissive posture to more dominant hyenas. Genitals, the anal area, and the anal glands are sniffed during greeting ceremonies in which each hyena lifts its leg and allows the other to sniff its anal sacks and genitals. All four species maintain latrines far from the main denning area where dung is deposited. Scent marking is also done by scraping the ground with the paws, which deposits scent from glands on the bottoms of the feet.

Hyenas have weak hind legs, make disgusting noises and are known to scavenge graves for food.

No thanks. I'd rather be a lion.

Katie said...

Well, I never claimed hyenas were handsome creatures...but they're certainly interesting! You can read the "social structure and hunting" section on the same wiki article and see that. All I'm saying is that lion's aren't any less disgusting than other predators...almost all carnivours will eat dead and rotting meat, including lions. And at least male hyenas do more than sit around farting and roaring all day. Nature is a wonderful thing, isn't it? :)

Anonymous said...

I think Lions lost a lot of respect after that abominable Lion King movie from Disney. Even if Jeffrey Irons was in it... it was a load of Pablum!

pappy d said...

I saw a recent documentary featuring lions photographed with night-vision lenses. Male lions are mostly active at night. It seems their whole reason for being is to fuck up hyenas & they're at it all night long.

I wouldn't have believed that 2 species of animal could seem to hate each other that much.

In the doc, a lion kills the cub of another male so his new mate will stop lactating & ovulate. The hyena cub of a dominant female kills & eats her sister at birth to further her own personal bid for stardom.

If you're truly determined to date according to moral criteria, better stick with people.

http://shop.nationalgeographic.com/jump.jsp?itemID=2862&itemType=PRODUCT&path=1%2C2%2C104%2C113%2C158%2C1011

Jenny Lerew said...

...hasn't anyone seen Dodsworth?

John Guy said...

Male Lions do serve an important function in lion society. They are too large and slow to be effective hunters. This is why the females do all the hunting. Male lions are big and strong so they can fight off threats to the pride from other predators, mainly hyenas and other male lions. Predators instinctively kill the offspring of rival predators, including their own species, to eliminate competition for prey in the future. A male lion must couragiously fight off rival preditors to earn the right to have the females hunt for them.

As far as animal qualities I look for in a mate. I would want a girl like a dolphin. Dolphins are intelligent, playfull, keen observers, and the only animal besides humans who engage in casual sex.

Unknown said...

Well if Eddie's original theory holds water then i might be in good shape because I have been several times been favorably compared to lions.

Sean Worsham said...

I too disagree Eddie, I have many lion-like qualities (note this isn't an ego trip, just pointing out that these qualities could have flaws) like my face, long-hair mane, nose and even eyes and yet the girls aren't beating my door down. Aw well, nice prediction to dream about though.

Rogelio T. said...

I agree but I think it's a little more complicated than this.
What I'm trying to say is "a noble lion is rarely ever a dignified lion".
Or something like that, let me explain.

Things like sensitivity and nobility are very attractive qualities; this is known, it's not some sort of mystery or anything.

It dosen't really matter if the lion is good, bad, lazy or a baby eater all that matters is does he appear that way when he's trying to attract a mate.

It's sort of like the male gorillas that slap their babies around when their mother isn't looking. When the baby starts to cry, the mother turns around to see the male holding it in his arms and rocking it back and forth. When she turns back around he slaps the baby again to keep the baby crying. He makes it look like he's trying to take care of the baby but he's really just trying to impress a mate.
Now a gorilla knows this is a good way to attract a mate so why wouldn't a human who is somewhat more intelligent know this and find a way to manipulate it.
Many people often try to show lion-like traits but it's really all for show.
Maybe there are some noble lions out there that really do care but I'm sure many don't. Is this similar to human behavior, for many people I think so.
I'm sure most people would disagree though.

I didn't want to come off sounding too awful but does what I'm trying to say make some sense.

Sean Worsham said...

Oh plus I fart too, and yet for some strange reason the girls aren't beating down my door!

Jenny Lerew said...

So no one's seen "Dodsworth"? Pity.

J. J. Hunsecker said...

>>So no one's seen "Dodsworth"? Pity.<<

Hi Jenny,

I done seen it, many moons ago. And (here's the kicker!) I read the book the film was based upon, too.

Sinclair Lewis is one of my favorite authors.

>>Isn't Dodsworth about a lion who-to his regret- married a poodle?<<

I always saw it as Sinclair Lewis satirizing American pretentions to be more European. Dodsworth earned his wealth but his wife isn't satisfied with that. (He's a vulgar Nouveau Riche, which lacks class.) In the novel she takes up with a nobleman who is broke, but he still has his title! (I think he's an Earl or something.)

I don't see Dodsworth as a lion, either. He to eager to please his wife. He even thinks she loves him. It takes him a long time to see her as she really is.

Eddie Fitzgerald said...

Anon: Interesting lion sculture, but it seems the restorer took some liberties. Or maybe he didn't. It would be scary to think of statues of that sophistication being made that long ago!

Jenny: Dodsworth is a hard film to come by. Not many people have seen it.

Katie: Holy Cow! I DID repeat myself! I know that now because I recollect getting a similar comment from you last time I talked about lions! Sorry!

The problem with talking about lions is that it makes all of us who don't think of ourselves that way feel uncomfortable. I almost didn't write the piece becuase I was afraid that it would make people feel bad. The truth is that most of us are some other animal. Steve says I'm a platypus but I feel more like a duck.

I wrote it anyway because I thought that all of us can still admire the lion. The real value of lions is that they raise the bar for the rest of us. By giving us something to shoot for they make us want to be better than we are. I can dream can't I?

Lester, Katie, Pappy: I think recent night photography changed the way scientists think of real lions. I think I saw Pappy's documentary. Lions are active hunters and hyena killers at night.

Anon, Looney: All that talk about hyena anuses and killing other lions' babies...! I'm glad I already ate dinner!

Rogelio: It's only my opinion but I think nobility exists in the world. Most people may fake it, as you said, but there must be some genuine articles otherwise where did all the great machines and novels and cartoons come from?

Hunsecker: Interesting. I never read the book. Maybe the book is more about Americans trying to copy the Europeans.

Jenny Lerew said...

Eddie, read the amazon.com reviews: "Dodsworth" is available on DVD, and has quite a lot of 4 star ratings(and intelligent, rapt reviews from all sorts of regular joes)for an obscure film.

It's also featured on Turner Classic Movie's website; they show it a lot. I hope everyone has cable and tapes or tivos the damn thing, because it's a brilliantly acted film. Even if I did think at first the Billie Burke had played the poodle--er, wife. Billie Burke?! What a lousy memory; it's Ruth Chatterton! I must have been mixing it up with "Bill of Divorcement" or something.
Eddie, have you ever seen "Midnight"? A comedy with Colbert and Don Ameche and Astor(in a good but smaller suppoting role)and best of all John Barrymore at his comedic best? How about "Twentieth Century"?
Just curious.
Hunsecker, Sidney here--that's moi--is certain you've seen all of the above. Figures you've read the book! I'm ashamed to say that although we had various Sinclair around the house growing up I found it boring--eh, what do you want from a 12 year old. I should definitely give him another try.
Thanks for the response!

Rogelio T. said...

I agree nobility does exist but I think it rarely ever comes from a lion or any other animal personality type consistently. We just like seeing it come from a lion and automatically say "he's a noble lion" it just makes for a better story. If it comes from a duck it's some sort of awful surprise but the lion always get's a free nobility pass no matter how awful he is. It's just the ways of the world.

People have told me that I'm a bear. Not because I match the defined traits for a bear but because my personality actually reminds some people of a bear. A friendly bear but definitely a bear.

Eddie Fitzgerald said...

Jenny: "Midnight?" Sounds great! I'm a big John Barrymore fan! he was great in "Topaze" (black and white version) and "Grand Hotel."

I haven't seen "Twentieth Century" in years. I'll look it up! Hey, I have an interesting film for you... "Disraeli" with Richard Arliss! It's a bad film but he does a great job in it and the script is really unorthodox and philosophical.

Rogelio: Interesting point! I agree!

Boy, lions have really taken a beating on the comments page! I had no idea they'd fallen so far out of favor.

J. J. Hunsecker said...

>>Hunsecker, Sidney here--that's moi--is certain you've seen all of the above. Figures you've read the book! I'm ashamed to say that although we had various Sinclair around the house growing up I found it boring--eh, what do you want from a 12 year old. I should definitely give him another try.
Thanks for the response!<<

Sinclair Lewis's books could be long and plodding when it came to story. It's his sense of humor and writing style that makes up for his weaknesses, in my opinion.

Eddie Fitzgerald said...

Hunsecker: Intersting! It makes me want to peruse Lewis' books.

Anonymous said...

I am a Lion.

But then again, I am One in 7 billions.

Anonymous said...

Wow amazing conversation lol. I got to this article while looking for Human Lioness as I beleive I am but really good info...appreciate your thoughts.
xx

Eddie Fitzgerald said...

Anon: Haw! My intuition leads me to believe me that you just might be a lion. If so, I'm envious.